Hollywood.

I had a really great lunch today with my group of mommy friends. Elizabeth and I continue to have a rather rough week, and it was such a relief to sit down and bitch with friends who are in the trenches with me, dealing with the same frustrations. It's just hard because as we were discussing, no matter what you do, you feel guilty about it or like you're not doing the right thing. The working moms feel guilty about leaving their children in daycare or with a nanny. I feel guilty that sometimes I want SO BADLY to get a break from the baby and fantasize about my previous life where I had four hours a day of quiet time on the train. The moms who have to supplement with formula feel bad about it. I feel like I did the baby a disservice by not teaching her to use a bottle well enough. The bottom line is, we're all doing the very best we can. And you can read as much as you want, you can listen to as many anecdotal stories from trusted (or sketchy) sources, but in the end, I am learning that I just have to trust that I know best for my little Ellie Bean. Yes, she's a difficult baby. She's willful and impossible and she has now developed an outside voice that makes an hour plus of unadulterated crying make me want to just rip all of my hair out, including eyebrows and nose hair. But through the crying, she will flash me a smile and that makes it all worth it.

Plus I have my amazing mom and husband, who give me the breaks here and there that I need. And I realize that someday soon she will be using a sippy cup and eating solids and she won't need me around all the of the time in order to fill her fat little baby belly. The days can seem unbelievably long when she's fussy, but the time is going so very fast. Her chubby legs are so long now, and that little head that once fit in my hands is now a giant old pumpkin. It won't be long until she's crawling, and then walking, and then running away from me.

Today I dressed her fancy in hopes that like her mama, she would feel better and be nicer when wearing a good outfit and fabulous accessories. It sort of worked! She was napping after lunch so I waked her through the mall, and purchased her some awesome sunglasses.

Here she is, maxing and relaxing, feeling very much like the next big Hollywood starlet.

And then of course, like a Hollywood starlet gone bad, she flashed her drawers. (Yes, I did buy her two pairs of sunglasses. They were two for six bucks!)

Then this afternoon I had a haircut, so Elizabeth was babysat by Grams, Gramps and Auntie Sara. An incredible tag team! When I walked into the house afterwards, I was just waiting to hear the baby wailing out of orneriness. However, I walked into the family room and saw THIS:

Those are some fabulous baby sitters!

Cute, but naughty.

She wore this darling outfit yesterday, while torturing me for eating too much garlic for dinner on Sunday night. Ugh. Those are the times that I hate nursing. But the rest of the time, it's a pretty good deal. I just bought her some sippy cups since she won't take a bottle, in hopes that we can get her to go to cups and never look back.

Yesterday was also tough because the rain meant we couldn't for our morning walk. She then ends up taking a shorter nap and spending more time squawking at me. This morning though, we locked and loaded at 8:30 and were out until after 10. She slept, I pushed and panted. A good time was had by all.

We also had swim lessons today! It was a different instructor, who was more aggressive, in a good way. Ellie spent more time putting her face in the water (which involved some sputtering) and working on her back float. She's a good floater. When your entire lower body is composed of fat cells, you're pretty buoyant. I mean, I would know.

In good news, the kitty Prozac has worked wonders for Lulu. Since her first dose, I have not seen or smelled a single carpet pee! She also seems less wary when walking around the house, and spends more time cuddling with me. On Monday, when I thought I might lose my mind during my second straight hour of nursing (minus the three minutes that I spent going to the bathroom in an effort to not wet my pants - the baby screamed the whole time) Lulu curled up next to me and just started purring. She's such a good girl.

Fashion Bug Plus!

Ready or not, here come's Ellie's fashion show. Week one of putting her in regular clothes instead of sleep and plays day in and day out has gone well! I did make the executive decision though that I am officially DONE with infant socks. They are stupid, impossible, and forever falling off. I have decided that if it's cold enough to require socks, she'll either have to wear pajamers, or just pants that happen to have attached feeties. It was funny - this week on the babycenter message board I read there was a question as to whether or not you take your kid out in pajamas, and so many women were like, "of course not, we get dressed in the morning because that is the only normal thing to do" (umm, so me wearing comfy pants unless I need to leave the house is abnormal?) and one woman said that she dressed her kid in regular clothes so that her baby would know that "pajamas are only for night time. Jeans and skirts are for daytime." Seriously? Your baby is 4 months old. She doesn't know anything about fabric. Except that it absorbs drool and spit up quite nicely.

Anyhow. Moving on.

Wednesday, in the time out chair. Last day of dratted baby socks.

Thursday in an outfit that makes her look like Cindy Lou Who.


Friday in an outfit from my friend Bianca. Tim is holding her up so you can see how fabulous her little bell bottoms are.

Saturday in a cute little gray and pink number, out smelling the flowers Grams planted in our flower box.

Sunday, at Grandma and Grandpa's house, where we stopped by for an impromptu visit. This one is a camera phone picture - the outfit looked even cuter than you can see. I mean, who doesn't love corduroy! And it has actual pockets in the back. For her keys and cell phone.

And if you think this is good, just WAIT until you see what I bought her today.

The Many Faces of Elizabeth Rosemarie.

Mildly concerned.

Saucy.

Delighted to see you.

Lipless.

So beautiful that I can hardly believe she's mine.

Outfits.

When I found out I was having a girl, I was over the moon. Mostly because I didn't think my son would appreciate all of my good jewelry, and also because girls clothes are so much cuter. I'm sorry, they just are.

Little did I know that I would end up being the laziest mom ever when it comes to dressing the baby. She lives in her footed sleepers from the clearance rack at Target - if she was grown up, she'd be Hugh Hefner, wandering around in her pajamas day in and day out. It's just easier - she's warm, she's happy, her feet are covered. Because if there's anything I truly hate, it's baby socks. They are impossible and mostly useless. Socks that never stay on do not keep little tooties warm.

But now that she's moving out of the really lumpy newborn stage, she has all of these great outfits in her dresser that she was given as gifts, and if I don't get her into them soon, she'll never wear them. So my mission, beginning yesterday, was to jam her into every one of her little outfits at least once, even if it means pulling out baby socks, and even if she cries when I change her clothes. Which, she does.

Maybe I will start a fashion blog for her when all of this is done!

Couple of Videos

From the past few weeks:





We had a fun day today! Lunch with our mommy and baby friends, and then a trip to knitting to hang out with our ladies and look at beads. And then she took a long nap for me when we got home, which is the happiest, quietest part of my day. Plus a quick trip back to mom and dad's to eat mom's mac and cheese, which is THE BEST on the entire planet. Couldn't be happier.

Swimmy Fish!

We had another great swim lessons today. Tim was able to meet us on his lunch break and so he took some pictures. By some, I mean over 100 during a 20 minute class. He did agree that seeing Ellie kick around in the pool is just about the cutest thing ever. I don't often brag or compare my baby to other babies (because usually she loses, considering that she can't roll over and fusses constantly) but my baby is the only one who really seems to kick her legs when put on her belly. She's basically the next Michael Phelps.

PLUS I had a more successful day dressing her and getting her ready for class - it's a lot of work! Swim diaper, plastic pants, bathing suit, robe! And none of them items have snaps, so it's basically a race against her little legs (always kicking!) And I didn't get lost trying to find the venue. Basically, a total win of a day.

Kick kick kicking! The baby to her left is Elizabeth's pal Elizabeth.

Look here Buster, where do you think you're taking me?

Fat legs for extra buoyancy!