A Funny Thought

(which I know I will get glared at for expressing. I am prepared for said glare.)

So, you know how sometimes your parents look at you when you've done something annoying or boneheaded, and say "oh, I hope you end up with a kid just like you," and you think, "FINE, ME TOO, I AM AWESOME."

Parents, think twice about expressing that sentiment. Because I have heard it more than once from my mom and dad. And now, as they wait eagerly to become grandparents, it's coming true. Granted, Sequins is not overdue yet, but like her mother, she seems to have no inclination to get born, just as 29 years ago, I hung out in the womb for an extra FIFTEEN DAYS until evicted.

Hope you're happy that I'm getting a kid just like me, mom and dad. Happy, and enjoying the interminable wait.

In the meanwhile, I am keeping busy today by scouring the house while blasting showtunes. I am secretly hoping that like her parents, the baby will love showtunes enough to want to come out.

Obligatory Baby Update.

Had my 39 week check up today. The baby has lots of delicious amniotic fluid. She grew quite a bit from last week but is still not alarming huge or anything. She was appropriately active on the nonstress test. The doctor once again proclaimed her "perfect." I am apparently very excellent at growing happy and healthy babies.

However, she continues to show no inclination towards moving towards the exit. She is fine sitting in the middle seat on a non-exit row even as the plane as approaching the airport for final descent. There is not really anything I can do to get her out, so the doctor said he would give me until week 42, but then we'll have to induce. I have my concerns about inductions, csections and medical interventions. In my hormonal state, I actually have a LOT of hysterical concerns, but I can't let myself get too crazy about it all.

I know I will have her in my arms by Halloween. Other than that, I am just working on taking deep breaths, enjoying her little baby kicks and rolls, and enjoying spending time with my boyfriend and our families. I feel like quite the watched pot, but it's nice that everyone is excited for our little arrival. All I can say is, we'll be sure to let everyone know when there is news to know, but in the meanwhile, send thoughts out to Sequins that she needs to get her bags packed and start heading south for the winter.

Date Night.

I have officially completed all of the tasks that involved pre-purchased tickets during the end of my pregnancy. So now Sequins can come when she wants, because I won't lose out on anything that I've already bought. Last night Tim and I head up to LA to see They're Playing Our Song at the Freud theater. It was funny to both of us because the day we found out we were pregnant, we also had a date at the Freud. We'd both commented "wouldn't it be funny if we went into labor tonight, and the baby's life was bookended by live theater?" It was not to be, which was probably for the best. One of the ladies at the theater saw my belly and said "you sure are brave." Little did she know I was an hour away from my hospital (but thankfully, minutes from UCLA medical center.)

The show was great and we had a fabulous date in Los Angeles, which is always fun. We walked around campus for awhile and joked that if Sequins did get into and attend UCLA, we would probably be the world's most embarrassing parents. We'd be the parents with season tickets who try to show up at their kid's dorm room too often, and who overshared about their own college experiences in the face of a bunch of bored teenagers.

Yesterday the guy came to clean up and fix our ceilings. It took him longer to tape everything off than it did to actually spray, so now that's finally done. Tomorrow the painters will come and put a coat of paint onto everything. And then, hopefully this long and beautiful construction project will be completed, and I can entertain myself with some dusting and some floor cleaning and other wonderful things. I am sincerely looking forward to it.

Other than that, no news to report. I am as pregnant as they come, and still pretty comfortable. The biggest thing I miss right now is being able to sleep on my stomach, and not having to flop around like a walrus every time I want to roll over in bed. I'm sure Tim is also excited about the prospect of me being able to move around without grunting and flailing and waking him up.

Not Boiling Yet.

Don't worry, I'm still pregnant. No babies to report here. Well, outside babies. The inside baby is still cooking and kicking away.

A funny story. So, sometimes I like to call Tim during the day to update him on things, or talk to him, or tell him something stupid that the cats have done. When he worked at EA, I'd always have to try his desk line and then leave it at that, since his cell phone didn't work in the building. Well, now his cell gets signal, so I call that first. Makes sense, right? Except that every time I call (which is not THAT often, I do have a life and things to do, you know) he picks up right away and sounds super panicked. And I'll be halfway into my story about Thory licking Lulu's face, and Tim'll interrupt me and be like, "sweetie? I just stepped out of a big meeting, can I call you back later?" So now my system is - if I need to tell him something dumb, or if it's something that does not require immediate attention (ie: if I am NOT calling to say that my water just broke) I call his office line. I am all about working out a system - especially after the day that I called and left him a voice mail on his cell to call me, but I WAS NOT in labor, so no rush, and then he called me back 4 times in 5 minutes trying to get ahold of me (I was on the other line with dad, and couldn't figure out why Tim was so frantic... turns out he hadn't gotten my voicemail.) These last few weeks of pregnancy, they are crazy. Now I know what a watched pot feels like.

I've spent a lot of nice time with mom and dad this week. What did I do when I lived 70 miles away? Wednesday mom and I did a craft project, which was a lot of laughs (mostly at how badly our scarves turned out) and then I stayed around to watch the Twins and pout at their inability to get it together versus the Yankees. Oooh, I hate those Yankees!

Then yesterday mom and I drove up to LA to visit the Los Angeles County Museum of Art to see their new exhibit on fashion. They had all of these beautiful garments from the 1700s and 1800s. They were absolutely amazing. I especially liked the ones with bustle styles - dresses that give you an even bigger butt really work with my shape. Also, dresses with lots of embroidery and sequins. It was just a really fun afternoon, and mom even let me pilot the Prius! It's also always fun to me to buzz through my old neighborhood.

So, that's where we are for now. Tomorrow Tim and I have tickets to see They're Playing Our Song at the Freud Theater at UCLA. That is, after the painter comes in at 8:30 and turns out house back into a giant dust bin. But we are almost finished, and odds are, the construction will be finished before we bring the baby home, which is all I really wanted.

40+

Whelp, it's Tuesday, so that means I budget two hours of my day to fart around at the doctor's office. Such is the life of a lady in her last month of pregnancy. We had our usual operating procedure, and Sequins was an overachiever on all counts. She looked darling on the ultrasound and is slightly above the curve in terms of growth at around 7.5 pounds. She's got plenty of amniotic fluid around her and is a happy little beautiful baby.

My blood pressure is fine and dandy and nothing to be concerned about. The baby rocked out during the nonstress test, with plenty of kicking and punching and accelerating heart beats. The nonstress test is a funny thing - I both love it and loathe it. On one hand, it's nice to just sit there for 20 minutes, reading a book, hearing the baby's heartbeat. The chair is comfy, I usually spend time texting with my child's father, and I talk to Sequins as she does her little baby dances. On the other hand, they always say "I'll be back to check on you in five minutes" and they NEVER come back until 10-15 minutes has passed. And there is no way of alerting a nurse or doctor that you are done or that the baby has moved and slipped off the monitor, other than unstrapping yourself and going out with a goo covered gut to talk to someone (which I have only done once, on a day when I was FURIOUS about being left for a REALLY long time.) Today Sequins got really busy in the first five minutes of the test (which would be enough for the doc to probably say "okay, you're good, get out of here") but I was there for almost a half hour while she alternated between sleeping and then kicking the crap out of me. I think I am going to suggest that they get some sort of alarm system in that room. Even just a tin can on a string would suffice. Especially because, not to be graphic, but I generally shotgun 12-20 oz of water or Gatorade before a doctor's appointment, and a half hour is a long time for me to be separated from bathroom access.

So, that's the baby news. As for me, the doctor said that my body is not doing anything that would indicate that labor is impending, and he thinks I'll go at least a week late. I'm not surprised - I've been feeling like I'll have an elephantine gestation since very early on in the pregnancy. I feel like it took me forever to show, and even at 9 months, I'm not very big (in the belly area. My walrus arms and shelf ass are a different story) and it's only been in the last two weeks that strangers have begun commenting on my pregnancy. I mean, I got through an airport without a single raised eyebrow at 35 weeks pregnant!

The good news is that I'm fine with going overdue. I'm still really comfortable, other than the constant bathroom breaks and the trouble I sometimes have falling asleep or staying asleep. I love having the baby live inside me, close to my heart. She's still moving all of the time, and I love just sitting there with my hand on my stomach, feeling her kick and roll and generally act up. I also realize that once I have her, my life will never be the same. An extra week of pregnancy might mean one more date night with Tim, or another chance to go up to LA to meet a girlfriend for lunch. I know everyone else is eager to meet her, and I am too, but I love being pregnant with this little nugget. Even if Tim does accuse me of hogging her. IT'S TRUE. I AM BOGARTING THIS BABY.

So, I guess this means that if you would like to revise your bet for when the baby will arrive, please let me know, and I can update the tally. At this point, there is no prize for being correct, but we can perhaps think of something. Like... winner gets a picture of my freakish belly button. Or not.

Here are some much cuter pictures:
Here you can see her cute little profile, and both of her grubby little paws up near her face.

She is super excited about her first post-season. I have purchased her a Homer Hanky of her very own. Hopefully, she will make it out in time for the World Series. At the very least, I'd like her to wear her Halloween costume.

The Construction Continues!

Well, here we are two weeks later, and still not done. The new painter/patcher came by today, took one look at the kitchen ceiling and said it couldn't be done with what he had in the truck. There'd been so much texture and paint and junk layered and scraped and layered and scraped on the ceiling that he's going to need to scrape it all down, bring out the texture gun and start fresh. The earliest he can do it is Saturday, and then on Monday someone else will be by to paint. It's a hassle, but it at least gives me a few days of down time between then and now to just relax around the house. I fully intend on cleaning the wood floors, even if they'll just get re-dirtied next weekend.

I also really like the new painter guy. He sort of looks like if Jeff Bridges got a haircut, and he sort of talks like Jeff Bridges' character in The Big Lebowski. The dude abides, and is going to fix my ceilings.

In the meanwhile, the plumbers are here installing a permanent water softener (forget you, Culligan!) and my new kitchen facet. Also, just crawling under all of the cabinets and checking the plumbing. I have to admit, the thing I am most excited about is getting our bathroom drain fixed so that it doesn't take a full minute for the sink to drain when you brush your teeth. They will be done today. The only downside of the plumbers is that they turned off the water for a couple of hours. It's hard to be a pregnant lady with limited toilet access.

Here, Thiel men, check out my appliances!


Tim laid those paving stones himself.

The good news is that my friend Becca and I did some brainstorming about how future renovations should go. Any kitchen or bathroom renos will have wait until Dad is formally retired, and then I will offer him a small stipend to supervise construction, and complete authority to make decisions. In the meanwhile, I will go on vacation and not come back until all of the work is done. I think it's the perfect plan.

Overall though, it's not so bad. All of the contractors have been really nice, everyone is doing a good job (or are totally willing to fix the bad jobs) and I haven't gone into labor in the middle of it all, and that's what really matters.

The cats are also doing better after getting a weekend pass out of kitty prison. Thor has put some weight back on, and now our next big job is getting him used to the ceiling fans. He won't come into the room if the fan is running, and if I carry him out in my arms, he cries and struggles until I put him down, and then he's out like a bolt of lightening. My plan is to take him into the office with me (because there's no good place to hide) run the fan and try to get him to see that nothing bad is going to happen to him.

Look at this little face. Can you see why I just want him to be happy?
He is just a little kitten with mittens.

The baby continues to be good. She hasn't dropped and no contractions, and I continue to maintain my theory that I'll go past my due date. In terms of actually giving birth, I realized last night that I am much like a cat. I'm sort of hoping I'll go into labor late at night so I can just sneak off and do it without too much hubbub. Sort of like a cat going and hiding in a drawer to have her kittens, and then carrying them around in her mouth to a good hiding place. I hope the skin on the back of Sequins' neck is strong enough for that.

Mostly Photos.

So much for sleeping in this morning - I was up at 6 and that was it. I predict quite the nap later this morning. In lieu of resting, let me offer you some pictures of the recent action around our house.

The paint job is not done. Yesterday the same dude who'd been struggling to get the patches right on Tuesday, Wednesday AND Thursday was sent again, this time with a sidekick. So... the dude can't get it right, and now he's the foreman of the job? After 4 hours of the same crap on a new day (texture the crap out of the ceiling, ask me what I think, I say it doesn't match, he tells me it either just needs paint or it just needs more texture, then I say I don't think so, scrape and start over...) I called uncle. The contractor is sending a different crew on Monday. He said the dude who'd been here usually handles patch and paint jobs of my size without problem. Well, the original 1 foot square patches in my foyer and bedroom have now become 3 foot blotches that look like ceiling pimples. And my kitchen just sort of looks like it's been painted - you can still see the exact outline of where the light box was. I have total faith in the contractor, I know he'll get it right and he won't leave until it's perfect, but SWEET FANCY MOSES. I am now 38 weeks pregnant. I'm hormonal. I'm nesting. I'm pretty OCD about cleanliness even when there isn't a second person sharing my internal organs with me. I am ready to not be sweeping my floors every night. I am ready to not be getting up at 6:30 to wrangle cats. So, hopefully they'll be done on Monday. Or maybe I'll go into labor and someone else can supervise the job. Just kidding, I am not ready to go into labor.

Would you like to see something funny?
So, since about week 30 or so, Sequins has been in the same general position at each ultrasound - head down, body on my left, feets on my right. I realized yesterday that when she's in her normal resting mode and I lean over, the left side of my belly actually sags forward. Can you see the bump on the left side? That's my little friend!

Oh, there was one good piece of painting and patching yesterday - they got the entire ceiling of the living room painted, so that room is complete. Here is a compare and contrast on the most commonly used room in the house, taken without using the flash.

Before: One floor lamp meant that if you lost the remote, you needed a flashlight to find it.

And now... LET THERE BE LIGHT!

Here's a picture of how Lulu spent most of her Friday in kitty prison.

But then she tried to bite a guard, and got sent to do some time in the hole.